[ she wants to ask if it's always like this, because she feels like she's in her own body, just blurred at the edges, and when he offers his hand for her to take, she takes it, laces their fingers together to feel the familiar warmth of his palm against her own.
she's never seen the inside of the hangar where they dock the jaegers during downtime. she'd never seen the becket brothers the way she sees them now, both so young, a little bit drunk and happy. she wishes she could carry a snapshot of this moment out with her and share it with her daughter.
but i don't know how-- and because the drift is all thought at the snap of a finger, the world blurs and changes again. maybe it's the sight of the boys that prompts it, but it's that night. the one she gathered the courage to pretend she was brave, egged on by friends who'd commented on the two blond boys in jaeger academy jackets sitting at the bar.
her then-bestfriend is whispering in her ear, don't be a chicken, go introduce yourself because she's been eyeing raleigh through his mirror reflection all night and god, he has the goofiest, cutest smile, he's like a puppy and she doesn't know why that is but wow, how is he so cute.
she looks over at raleigh then, offers him a sheepish smile because she can feel the way he's grinning. what. it changed before i could pick something different. ]
[ it's really interesting to feel her bashfulness. it mixes with the emotions of the memory in an odd way and he's--really kind of flattered watching this. even as he thinks, is there no one on this earth that doesn't think of me like a puppy? seriously.
if he could kiss her in the drift, he would. ( maybe if they've got the time before they finish up he'll see if they can't do that. ) the room shifts a little as he lets his own perceptions of this night leak into the memory. the way he thought she was so damn pretty and the way his heart beat against his rib cage so hard when she smiled at him and wrote her number on his hand. i may never wash this hand again, eighteen-year-old raleigh had thought.
and he never, ever told yancy about that thought because it was kind of stupid, but he was really kind of star struck by her.
you up for something more difficult? he thinks, but before he can get an answer out of her the scene changes again. maybe if he was more experienced in hopping from rabbit hole to rabbit hole it wouldn't have. but he doesn't, so they end up in an alleyway. the trashcans that line it all have kanji on them and there's a little girl in a blue peacoat that comes rushing in and hides behind a can.
he'd asked mako if he could use this memory since it's distant enough from anything he and naomi has experienced to hopefully not shake them up too much as they ease their way into naomi's more painful memories. she'd agreed and he's grateful for that. it's a little like mental whiplash to go from nice nights at bars to onibaba. he can't imagine what it would be like to go from that to what they came here to find. ]
[ she is definitely up for kissing him if that's actually allowed in here. but at the same time, she can't help but feel shy.
after raleigh had sat her down one afternoon to say babe, i have an idea about dealing with the blanks in your head she'd actually done a bit of research on the way brains worked and how people could read them. how activity here meant infatuation ( and also hints of obsessive-compulsive disorder, who knew? ) and while all the jargon had made her head ache, she gets enough of the gist to understand a fraction of how it all works.
she's trying to shrug off the embarrassment when the drift shifts and she starts seeing that same memory from his point of view. it actually makes her pause, because she looks exactly like herself but also a whole world different through his eyes.
( she distinctly remembers agonizing over how unsophisticated her choice of eye-shadow had looked a purple cardigan with pink piping, naomi? really? and thank god, i got rid of that scarf geek palettes for the win, but never am i using that again, not if i am trying to impress people. )
she looks... perfect ( raleigh, stop ) like there's something in her smile and the way she'd bitten her lower lip as she scrawled her number on his palm and how yancy had been watching all of this with a smirk on his face before he shook his head and told raleigh that the had class in the morning.
( i may never wash this hand again and the way her friends had all squealed when they headed out to the parking lot, god, naomi, i am so jealous the older brother was totally scoping you out did you give him your number did you did you did you and the disappointment days later when he didn't call. )
i was such a kid. she thinks, and she remembers what it was like to cry over a stupid boy on her sister's shoulder, the way kara had done her make-up that friday night because the girls wanted to go out and to cheer her up, they were bringing out the big guns but that's your Urban Decay palette, yeah, my sister deserves to be gorgeous, come here, Mimi, let me work my magic on you and everything it led to when yancy becket called her name.
raleigh pulls her back before her memories can pull her across ( the rabbit a tempting thing, because that night changed everything for her ) asks if she wants to try something higher up the difficulty ladder but before she can say a thing the world just changes over and the first thing that catches her attention is the smell of the alleyway, the damp and sharp that one associates to snow. there's a little girl in blue, a lone red shoe bright against the gloom nd the ground shakes and a roar pierces the air.
she doubles over, unexpectedly. each footfall a blunt strike to her middle and her hand falls sharply away from raleigh as she drops to her knees. there's blood on her mouth when she looks up at him babe, i'm scared ( raleigh, you listen to me-- ) and for half a heartbeat the world hazes over before everything goes dark.
---
( you are naomi sokolov, yes? we have heard curious things about you. ) please. the unmistakable puncture of the needle on her skin. please, just leave my daughter alone. ( we are curious about the little girl named yancy. you are involved with raleigh becket, yes? ) please, i don't know what you want from us. please, don't hurt my little girl. ]
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slfkjhasdlfkjhsdfkh i LOVE it
she's never seen the inside of the hangar where they dock the jaegers during downtime. she'd never seen the becket brothers the way she sees them now, both so young, a little bit drunk and happy. she wishes she could carry a snapshot of this moment out with her and share it with her daughter.
but i don't know how-- and because the drift is all thought at the snap of a finger, the world blurs and changes again. maybe it's the sight of the boys that prompts it, but it's that night. the one she gathered the courage to pretend she was brave, egged on by friends who'd commented on the two blond boys in jaeger academy jackets sitting at the bar.
her then-bestfriend is whispering in her ear, don't be a chicken, go introduce yourself because she's been eyeing raleigh through his mirror reflection all night and god, he has the goofiest, cutest smile, he's like a puppy and she doesn't know why that is but wow, how is he so cute.
she looks over at raleigh then, offers him a sheepish smile because she can feel the way he's grinning. what. it changed before i could pick something different. ]
no subject
if he could kiss her in the drift, he would. ( maybe if they've got the time before they finish up he'll see if they can't do that. ) the room shifts a little as he lets his own perceptions of this night leak into the memory. the way he thought she was so damn pretty and the way his heart beat against his rib cage so hard when she smiled at him and wrote her number on his hand. i may never wash this hand again, eighteen-year-old raleigh had thought.
and he never, ever told yancy about that thought because it was kind of stupid, but he was really kind of star struck by her.
you up for something more difficult? he thinks, but before he can get an answer out of her the scene changes again. maybe if he was more experienced in hopping from rabbit hole to rabbit hole it wouldn't have. but he doesn't, so they end up in an alleyway. the trashcans that line it all have kanji on them and there's a little girl in a blue peacoat that comes rushing in and hides behind a can.
he'd asked mako if he could use this memory since it's distant enough from anything he and naomi has experienced to hopefully not shake them up too much as they ease their way into naomi's more painful memories. she'd agreed and he's grateful for that. it's a little like mental whiplash to go from nice nights at bars to onibaba. he can't imagine what it would be like to go from that to what they came here to find. ]
no subject
after raleigh had sat her down one afternoon to say babe, i have an idea about dealing with the blanks in your head she'd actually done a bit of research on the way brains worked and how people could read them. how activity here meant infatuation ( and also hints of obsessive-compulsive disorder, who knew? ) and while all the jargon had made her head ache, she gets enough of the gist to understand a fraction of how it all works.
she's trying to shrug off the embarrassment when the drift shifts and she starts seeing that same memory from his point of view. it actually makes her pause, because she looks exactly like herself but also a whole world different through his eyes.
( she distinctly remembers agonizing over how unsophisticated her choice of eye-shadow had looked a purple cardigan with pink piping, naomi? really? and thank god, i got rid of that scarf geek palettes for the win, but never am i using that again, not if i am trying to impress people. )
she looks... perfect ( raleigh, stop ) like there's something in her smile and the way she'd bitten her lower lip as she scrawled her number on his palm and how yancy had been watching all of this with a smirk on his face before he shook his head and told raleigh that the had class in the morning.
( i may never wash this hand again and the way her friends had all squealed when they headed out to the parking lot, god, naomi, i am so jealous the older brother was totally scoping you out did you give him your number did you did you did you and the disappointment days later when he didn't call. )
i was such a kid. she thinks, and she remembers what it was like to cry over a stupid boy on her sister's shoulder, the way kara had done her make-up that friday night because the girls wanted to go out and to cheer her up, they were bringing out the big guns but that's your Urban Decay palette, yeah, my sister deserves to be gorgeous, come here, Mimi, let me work my magic on you and everything it led to when yancy becket called her name.
raleigh pulls her back before her memories can pull her across ( the rabbit a tempting thing, because that night changed everything for her ) asks if she wants to try something higher up the difficulty ladder but before she can say a thing the world just changes over and the first thing that catches her attention is the smell of the alleyway, the damp and sharp that one associates to snow. there's a little girl in blue, a lone red shoe bright against the gloom nd the ground shakes and a roar pierces the air.
she doubles over, unexpectedly. each footfall a blunt strike to her middle and her hand falls sharply away from raleigh as she drops to her knees. there's blood on her mouth when she looks up at him babe, i'm scared ( raleigh, you listen to me-- ) and for half a heartbeat the world hazes over before everything goes dark.
---
( you are naomi sokolov, yes? we have heard curious things about you. ) please. the unmistakable puncture of the needle on her skin. please, just leave my daughter alone. ( we are curious about the little girl named yancy. you are involved with raleigh becket, yes? ) please, i don't know what you want from us. please, don't hurt my little girl. ]